How to Have Holy Sex

How to Have Holy Sex

There is an aggressive rage of the demons of sexual perversions ravaging the world today particularly Christendom and polluting the minds of men including Christians who should be a light radiating into the dark world (Matthew 5:14).

The sexual demons are luring men into sexual abominations that desecrate the sacredness of God’s holy orders – marriage and sex – which He created to propagate and multiply the human race.

The sexual abomination that occurred in Genesis 6:4 was one of the major reasons God took the decision to destroy the world of Noah. God took the same stand in Sodom and Gomorrah in Genesis Chapter 19 where sexual abominations were the order of the day in that society. 

In our present world, unholy and ungodly sexual activities are rampant and being shamelessly celebrated. Fathers are having sex with their daughters and mothers too are doing same with their sons. Men are marrying men and women too are marrying women.

 All kinds of horrible, disgusting, demon inspired sexual perversions are occurring and even in marriage, many couples engage in sexual perverse activities contrary to the Word of the Lord. 

Sexual intercourse was created and ordained by God in Genesis 2:24 that say a man shall leave his father and mother and cleave unto his wife and they shall become one flesh. The sexual union makes a man and his wife become one flesh.

Sex is a wonderful experience in marriage (Proverbs 5:18-19). Verse 18 in these scriptures says ‘let thy fountain be blessed and rejoice with the wife of thy youth’ and verse 19 says ‘let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe and let her breasts satisfy thee at all times and be thou ravished with her love.’ 

These scriptures indicate that in sexual terms, a man should be satisfied with his wife only (Proverbs 5:20).

Sex was created for marriage between a man and a woman in lawful wedlock. The marriage is a lawful wedlock where parental consent was obtained and where dowry/bride price was paid where the culture requests for it (Genesis 24).

Cohabiting with a woman in the name of a marriage without her parental consent and payment of dowry/bride price where applicable is an unlawful wedlock. Anything done in an unlawful wedlock is illegal and unholy.

The ‘husband’ in such unlawful wedlock is a thief in the eyes of the Lord who must do necessary restitution to convert his unlawful union to a lawful wedlock recognized by the Word of the Lord God.

Any sex conducted before a man or woman marries known as premarital sex is ungodly and unholy and is also known as fornication, a sin before the Lord God. Likewise, any sexual intercourse between a married person with another person besides his lawful spouse, constitutes an ungodly and unholy intercourse known as adultery (Exodus 20:14).

Marriage was created for one man and one woman because God created one Eve for one Adam and the Bible says that two shall become one. Therefore, marriage is monogamous for life as long as the partners live, being bound to each other for life (Romans 7:3) (1 Corinthians 7:39). 

Lawful sexual intercourse is that conducted between the man and only his lawful spouse. Having a lover (girlfriend, mistress or a concubine) besides one’s lawful wife is unlawful and any sexual intercourse with such lovers in ungodly.

Likewise, for the wife to have a lover (man friend, boyfriend or whatever appellation) besides her lawful husband, is ungodly and any sexual intercourse with such lovers is unholy as well.

Adultery is unholy sexual intercourse and the command in Exodus 20:14 that prohibit it uphold the sacredness of marriage and the divine appointment of marriage.

Where a wife separates from her husband on grounds not allowed in the Scriptures, she is to remain unmarried for the rest of her life or else be reconciled to her lawful husband (1 Corinthians 7:10-11). Divorces and remarriages are generally not allowed for every cause in the Scriptures (Malachi 2:14-16) (Matthew 5:32) (1 Corinthians 7:10-11).

Where a wife separates unlawfully from her lawful husband and ‘marries’ another man or cohabits with another man, it is an adultery and any sexual intercourse in that arrangement is ungodly and unholy as well.

1 Corinthians 7:5 says that husbands and wives in lawful wedlock must respect each other regarding lawful sexual needs, to pay the matrimonial debt and render the conjugal duty to each other, mutually satisfying each other.

According to the same scripture (1 Corinthians 7:5), husbands and wives belong to each other and neither has any authority to refuse what the other needs or demands in a normal temperate relationship. All acts of perversion or unnatural affection – oral sex, anal sex, menstrual sex, masturbation, vibrator sex etc. – must be rejected.

By the same verses, a couple may by mutual consent and for an agreed time abstain from sexual intercourse for purposes of prayer and fasting and come together again in order not to fall into sexual sin.

Self-control must be exercised in sexual activities between husbands and wives (1 Corinthians 6:12). Self-control is essential to holy living (Galatians 5:22). 1 Corinthians 5:22 says ‘all things are lawful unto me but all things are not expedient: all things are lawful unto me but I will not be brought under the power of any.’’

This means that we should not allow anything (sex included), to control us or to have authority over us. The Bible also teaches about moderation in appetites and passions.

I wish to make a digression:

In an online relationship forum, someone asked a question that if on a Sunday morning, a wife is fully dressed and ready to leave for church, her husband has a sexual urge and wants sex, should the wife undress for sex and go to church late?

Most of the respondents said that they would undress and have the sex first and go to church late or not go at all, that the sexual desire must first be fully satisfied before attending to church. I disagree with their position on several grounds as follows:

§  First, it constitutes an abuse of God’s time. Ecclesiastes 3:1-10 says there is a time for everything. A focused Christian who values the essence of attending church would not allow anything to hinder him from going to church or to get there late. The sex should wait until after the church service. God says in 1 Samuel 2:30 that He would despise anyone who despises Him.

§  Secondly, it constitutes a dishonor for God and a lack of fear of Him and a fear for man above God (Matthew 10:28). Assume it was a working day that the wife is fully dressed and ready to leave for her work place that her husband develops an urge; would she undress for sex and end up getting to her place of work late or not going at all? 

If the husband is fully dressed and ready to leave for work and develops a sexual urge, would he stay behind to first have sex and get to his place of work late?  Are we fearing and honoring our earthly employer’s time above God and God’s time? 

Dishonoring God and fearing men above God was King Saul’s blunder in 1 Samuel 15:24 that caused God to reject him as King.

§  Thirdly, it indicates despising spiritual things and gratifying the flesh above the things of the Spirit which was Esau’s blunder in Genesis 25:29-34 that ruined his destiny.

§  Fourthly, such a Christian who has sex at the time he should be in Church is a carnal Christian who cannot please the Lord (Romans Ch.8). Sex is a natural and carnal desire that is not sinful in itself but when it is conducted in ways that violates other laws of God, it becomes sinful carnality.

The above violations are attributed to a lack of self-control (1 Corinthians 6:12-13). Self-control must be exercised to disallow anything fleshly from ruling over us, dominating or controlling us. Abuse of sex or any of the other passions through lack of self-control can ruin one’s destiny.

Holiness is required in the use of sex in lawful marriage (Hebrews 13:4) (1 Thessalonians 4:2-8). We are to abstain from sexual sins and to possess our bodies in sanctification and honor.

When a husband honours his own body and that of his wife as vessels of honour unto God, he will not abuse his body and hers in sexual terms and will not defile his matrimony.

The body of man is the temple of God to be kept holy. God vows to destroy anyone who abuses and defiles His temple which the body of man is (Romans 12:1-2) (1 Corinthians 3:16-17) (1 Corinthians 6:20).

Excessive sexual lusting and vile passions that includes the sexual perverse activities and ungodly sex styles and positions are dishonorable practice. These constitute heathen practices and those that engage in them are worthy of death and hell (Romans Chapter 1).

God forces no one to believe Him or to abide by His Word because man is a free moral agent. But His Word in Revelations 21:8 says that the immoral and the abominable shall have their part in the Lake of Fire that burns with brimstone.

May we not go from church to hell in Jesus name. Amen

Ayodele John Adegbulugbe

www.xtianrace.blogspot.com.ng
Lagos, Nigeria